It has been said the greatest work we will ever do will be within the walls of our home.
We choose a life mate, husband or wife, sometimes with the greatest of ignorance of who we are, or even of what person our choice is. And then the learning, the work begins.
Today, open your eyes and heart to your life mate. Open your eyes to your journey of learning about yourself, and feel gratitude for the willingness of your mate to accompany you on that journey. And, strengthen your willingness to accompany your mate.
This before considering your children. Then, about your children: “The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.” ~ David O McKay
Of course, the reverse is as true, a mother’s love for her children’s father.
As the cornerstone and foundation of your family, value the precious gift of love you give your children in loving your mate.
Without family, you are not family.
Your family is everything. As a toddler and young child we love our parents more than anything or anyone in the world. And reciprocally, as a parent, we adore our precious little ones.
While pre-teen and teenage years bring both parents and children confusion and mixed emotions as the children go through the developmental staging of identity vs. confusion (I-know-what-I-believe vs. I-am-lost), hopefully time and experience bring children and their parents to a strong sense of grounded-ness and happiness.
And through all these years and experiences, there is a wonderful place in your home that holds a critical repeated experience to ground both children and their parents.
This is your dinner table. Your family meals can hold some of the most important experiences and conversations you and your children ever have. Right at your family table.
This week, make a decision to share dinners with your family, without any phones, or other devices - just with each other. Through those, teach them how much they are loved, learn about their perspectives, teach them the values you hold precious and teach them more about their world through your eyes.
And, an extra gift will be yours - to understand your parents’ love, as you guide your children.
Have important times together. Get your family back. Love and learn together.
In the first light of a springtime morning in East Texas, the sun teases with pale peach and pink streaks across the eastern sky. It is quiet. The peace of the morning is perfect for meditative time, to fill my mind with courage and joy, abundance, peace and gratitude.
If not careful, the morning scoots by and you’re on your way to the day’s busy-ness, going and coming, to and fro…
This week, you could give yourself the gift of the morning moments to fill your mind with the love and peace of the morning. It can become a wonderful habit that changes the day to come for the best.
The light is changing now, brighter and whiter, signaling the day’s energy.
Enjoy your day. Make it a fun day, a productive and successful one.
Love and peace,
We think of a leader as someone who heads up a big company, a government or political movement. And, perhaps that person is indeed a leader.
ONLY IF that person has become a master at influencing others.
ONLY IF that person can help others change their thoughts, beliefs and actions for the better, as Jim Rohn says.
Are you a leader? Do you help others change for the better? Do you influence others for the better?
To master the art of influencing others for the better requires one absolute - LOVE.
You can help people with more than their health, their dental and orthodontic care. As a leader, you help them with their jobs, their families, their parenting, their joy, their coping, their very lives.
Great leaders care very very much about others.
Loving you and your leadership,
In Abu Dhabi one afternoon, as I parked for my hair appointment, my car suddenly took a little lurch.
I looked around, then back to discover another much larger SUV had bumped into my car. Once we got it sorted out, poor guy - he felt awful and really awful when he saw the damage to his Range Rover - the police report said for me, “No Faulty.”
We use “No fault” to imply who will be financially responsible for repairs to the vehicles. Funny, because while one party is under the “no fault” off-the-hook financial umbrella, the other party is indeed “to blame.”
Blame is a human trait that our egos use to attempt to “protect“ ourself (if it’s your fault, then it’s not my fault).
BUT it doesn’t work. We still feel bad. Love works.
(Even knowing that, when I drop something or make a mistake, I still find myself instinctively looking around for who might have caused it.)
Blame none, love all. That works.
Our son and daughter, Trey and Molly, were most fortunate to train with (all the way to Black Belt and beyond), an incredible Taekwondo Master who taught them martial arts, life, and spirituality. Mr. Brian Chewning taught them that there are two steps to success:
And, DON’T STOP.
And, avoid what the 95% do: Watch a lot of TV, news & movies, eat unhealthfully, sit a lot, forget to exercise, and don’t start anything new.
“You don’t have to be great to start, but you do have to start to be great!” ~ Zig Ziglar & taught by Brian Chewning
Thank you Mr. Chewning, for your wisdom, insight, dedication, motivation and commitment to your students and to everyone with whom you come in contact. You make us all better.
Now we know.
A “Knockout” is a fight-ending win for the boxer who is NOT knocked out.
Life can come down so intensely, so debilitatingly, that you may feel as if it’s over. It’s a KO.
In sports, it’s up to the referee. In life, it’s up to you! It’s a KO ONLY if you decide it is.
Your mindset - your attitude - your philosophy - is the stakeholder here!
“Those with a grateful mindset tend to see the message in the mess. And even though life may knock them down, the grateful find reasons, if even small ones, to get up." - Steve Maraboli
Even the most crippling, debilitating life events bring opportunities for strength, for life transformation for you and others, rather than eviscerating, stoppage of everything good.
Decide for gratitude NOW, for the amazing goodness in your life, and ready yourself to lean on your grateful, trusting mindset as soon as you can, when your most difficult, your most challenging life events come to pass.
Hold on to life. Get up. Live with love, every minute of every day that you can.
You’re still needed. Even more than before.
Go to love. ASAP.
... that is the title of a book by John Gray.
Anyone who is married knows what it’s like to attempt to explain/communicate/discuss with their husband or wife.
You know how easy it is to feel, “If you just think like I do, it’ll all be good.” (Ha)
You know how easy it is to feel, “What planet are you from??"
And it’s not just male vs. female. We are all so different in our perceptions (what we see), our perspectives (what we feel), our words (how we learned to talk and express).
Communication. Whew! Tough!
“To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.” ~ Tony Robbins
Surely. BUT - in the heat or frustration of trying to communicate, to understand, to make our point, there is probably only one best way to succeed.
That is through LOVE. When it seems you aren’t succeeding, your point is obscure to your listener, your listener does not understand - or care, STOP and think to just love the other person.
Your point may get more obscure with more talk, more emotion.
Just stop. Just love. Communication - Maybe later. Maybe never.
The communication of love can win the day. No matter your point.
How we adults wish sometimes that we could be the child, taken care of, looked after, protected, as we do for and with our beloved children. The world can be a scary place.
Yet we spend the greatest part of our lives being adults, called to personal responsibility, coping, courage, commitment, motivation, and dedication.
It’s easy to feel alone. We yearn for guidance, surety.
This is where trust and faith come in. It’s about something greater than ourselves.
It’s about knowing you are Divinely guided.
It’s about knowing the turns you take in the roads of life will work together for good.
It’s about knowing God can make a way where there “is no way.”
It’s about expecting the best, and then trusting you have Divine guidance.
It’s about experiencing that life includes love - and loss.
It’s about knowing the problems are not the problems, but rather are there to bring you to strength.
The Grace is there. But for the trust, the faith.
Worry - something we all learn to do.
Worry - something that creates more worry.
Worry - something that pushes away the things you want.
Worry - something that makes you feel terrible.
Worry - Work at ridding yourself of worry.
To manifest your desires - success, joy, happiness, peace, abundance - you won’t get very far with worry in the mix.
Shift the way you feel and watch what happens. If you can get rid of thoughts of worry, you will find things to worry about will lessen and disappear.
Bob Newhart did a very funny skit about worry, called Stop It. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ow0lr63y4Mw) Worth a watch, as its message is timeless and true.
Taking a clue from that playbook, as you find yourself worrying, or obsessing on negatives, tell yourself, “Stop it!”
As the musical group, The Police sing, “Every move you make, every word you say, every step you take…” Every thought you think, every word you say and every move you make is creating your future.
Dwell on the positive. Your thoughts become your life.
Le Chaim - to Life!
Dr Chris Baker
Dr. Chris Baker is Past President of the American Orthodontic Society, a pediatric dentist and teacher of orthodontics, An author, dental practice consultant, mentor, and a current or former faculty member of three U.S. dental schools, Dr Chris practices and blogs in beautiful Abu Dhabi, UAE, and glorious Texas, USA.
Text and images
© 2019 Dr Chris Baker